Im kind of to the point where im am fed up in others opinions toward me on this acensin path. I only complain to gain answers not to induce angery comments or derrogetory input my way. I have learned throught this, that ego is a big participant in the way people see and interpret things and opinions. I see more and more people envoloped in their own ease at this because of their financial and more successful prowes. it is almost as if the people claiming to be ascending easily and without pain or suffering as i am going through.
In order for me to have the ones that think i am a complainer a negative person or having a crappy attitude in all of this. i want to smack those in the head for they really have no clue about me or my journey thus far. what i am is an individual human being. but before that i am a soul or spirit trapped in duality because of my choice to help the rest of humanity wake up. i am tired of this watching everyone denigh what my journey has taught me and what my soul knows. i am tired of those so called lightworkers that make this all seem so simple and easy to learn. to me those folks are the truely lost ones. they were the people that i looked up to until now. they have ruined most of my faith beause of their arrogance and to me i see nothing but false light and ego controlling them.
the world is changing, but not the way it needs to. people are still hanging on to their belief in money, success and power. i still see people wanting to hold on to their personal power of knowledge and control by being better or more free than others.
as far as i am concerned, we are all the same. we are all equal. so why is it that people still critisize my comments or complaints, rathher than help me along and show me what im missing.
i suffer because i believe my suffering is the reflection of what the earth is going through.
i am 44 years old. but feel 90 act 90 in my physical body. my liver failed when i was 30. my ego died when that happened. the time after that, i slowley stopped being human and more like the living walking, sick earth. i believe that everything i am going through and have gone through, is the deterioration of the earth. the surface like me, shows little signs of aging, but the fact is that my strength is that of the earth right now. very very weak. i have stopped putting poison in my body which is everything on the face of this contaminated earth. my core is healthy like the earth but my physical being is weary and withered.
other things that most dont know about me is that i have removed all the metals in my teeth. now it is hard to eat at all. i have been forced by forces beyond human understanding, to not work, to get out of the system, to remove every human aspect out of my being. i dont believe anyone else has or will go through this. i dont expect anyone to have to. i believe that i am the one chosen for this . so to me you are all my children and i do this for you.
i have no assistance other than whatever is directly given to me as i continue on this path.
not one person remains at my side to help me in any way shape or form.
i am truely alone in this, and that is why i will always complain or question everything presented to me. it would be nice if the non believers and ones still driven by ego and power would stop judging what i say but instead direct me to a more possative place.
not everyone, especially me, has money or the assets or influence to do the things necessary to achieve ascension. not everyone is a well off wealthy abundant, human being.
stop making what you think and achieve, the only route to sanctity.
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