here is what i envision, feel, and just know of that appears to be my unseen future, not yet lived by my or at least not in this 3d reality.
i began my spiritual journey about 15 years ago.. this was after i could not contain the ego that was consuming me due to heavy abuse of alcohol. i was used to being a fully functional alcoholic although it had taken indirect influence on this life and was conforming me to be mind controlled like the rest of humanity. alcohol, i came to later find out after a few years of sobriety. i had begun to deteriorate like most that do under my affliction. i learned that ego was the main controlling mechanism in being that controlled alcoholic. the booze, i saw, was the booster of ego, and when i got sober after years and years. my liver failed prior to my sobriety, forcing me to choose between life and death.
some would call what i went through, the ego death.
during my illness, i was induced into a coma. during this 13 days, i had not only visions of my future, but i saw things that were my worst fears. i was, or had no choice but to face them, and beat them. i believe that this was my test of will.
as the years went past, i recovered like no doctor predicted, my liver would regenerate from 13 percent to, now, 100 percent. i started to see things that i saw in my coma, happening in my real life. it wasn't until about 7 years ago, that the tips shunt that they had put in my liver, malfunctioned. i lost 4 pints of blood internally. i came as close to dying as possible. this hospital stay induced more spirituality into my life. i began to get signs and presented things that led to my great awakening.
videos, names, dates, theories, and just unadulterated knowledge from what i now call, my higher self.
i can never explain the things that i have seen, nor can i describe the things that i know or feel are the truth and nothing but.
with my health being fully restored at this point, i lived my life still in the system that i had grew to despise. it has been hard for me to follow my spiritual path, knowing the things that i know. now you might call it crazy and retarded, but i believe that the divine plan has to happen this way. with that being said, it was like god actually forced events to happen to me to get me out of the system, to quit feeding the beast, s to speak. i was unable to paint or do anything physical, to save my life. this included losing work, my apartment, my girl, her kids, and my license.
i can see this now as the shedding of things i will no longer need in the future. getting rid of the life i once knew, while everyone that i know and love, is adhering to the system. i gave up all material things, i stopped worrying so much about money and work or being normal, ever again.
i see the sacrifices that i have made as the key to the whole of humanities transformation. the god spark in me is doing something to me that it cant do to everyne. god could never expect all humans to do the things that i did and do.
in my knowing, when connected to source or my over soul, or higher self, i see my life outside of 3d and i see my future life in 5d. the life i was in when the mission was initiated.
its more like i know what this life is, but i haves family and many other things that will become possible in the 5th.
in my signs, i am constantly reminded that i have a family of five. a wife, 2 girls, and a boy.
from what i gather, the girls and the boy are step brother and sisters. i believe that we live in a tropical place and have access to the entire universe. i also get signs of having things in 5d that are not possible in 3d. animals, for example. lions and tigers and other wild but no so wild animals.
things are shown to me through others lives. as one, we are all connected in that way.
do you believe in dragons and elemental beings ? i believe that how to train your dragon was about me and my dragon. know this, can be construed as a parrot or a bird, which in many cases of friends and family. cars and other things that i have always wanted here in 3d but could not have, have always been a sign of what i really have in 5d.
duality is the reason that i am, in this 3d life, single. for true love, unconditional love, is not possible in duality because of the ego that usually destroys all unity. you cant share a heart with ego attachments like hatred, anger, jealousy or revenge. not to mention that marriage in 3d is another contract designed to control the masses. all of the things that attach humanity to the control system, are pretty much written out of my life.
but, i am still having doubts and worries because none of this, beside my imagination, comes directly with proof. i have been going through the changes that the earth as well as it inhabitants are going through, at personal levels. it has become that i am weak and out of balance, as is the earth,. the eath is sick and going through a great cleansing. so am i.
i understand that everything that i personally go though, is exactly what the earth is going through. i await the new and improved earth along with my regeneration.
i want to use an analogy from a comic book super hero. when " superman " got infected with yellow kryptonite, he was poisoned with ego. he turned to the dark side and used his powers to abuse rather than preserve. when he finally broke the spell that was cast on him, he was reborn. so, if you think of what i went through and what damage the earth went through, you can understand this analogy.
another is " he-man." when darkness reined, the sorceress, who represented gaia, lost her powers. only be drained of her energy. after he man destroyed the ark, she too, was regenerated. regained her powers, and healed the realm.
during the last 4 years, i have went to breatherinism. living off of light. my vibration and frequency has raised to the point that the normal 3d living has become more than annoying. my gravity is not the same as you, there for walking is hard. my muscles are all healthy and strong, yet i can not properly use them like a normal person in the lower vibration. in essence my body has become that of an old man. i move almost as if in slow motion. everyday things like writing and drawing, cooking, or talking, getting dressed or undressed literally takes 5 times longer than a man of my age.
like i said, i gave up everything that i know and love as sacrifice. but when do i know for sure that i am correct in reading my signs, keeping my faith, and risking it all. it seems that 4 years now, i have been waiting to break free of this 3d duality, move on, into the future, and live again, eternally.
i am scared, to this day, that all of this has been for nothing. but that, to me is ego selfishness talking.
i miss the family of 5 that i dream of. i miss knowing what i really know, the truth.
if i read more into my signs, i see dates in this month of October as being the key to my ascension, but i could be wrong, because every time i zoom in on a specific date, nothing ever happens.
if we are one, if i am a soul fragment of source, then me, my sister,mom and dad, are also me in this matrix. my folks anniversary is the 6th, my dads birthday is the 10th, my sisters is the 8th, and mine is on the 30th. my signs tell me that if i am all of the above, then those dates are a reference to my eternal marriage and the dates of my future kids birthdays. my boy being born on the 30th, my marriage on the 6th, and my one daughters birthday on the 8th and the other on the 10th.
i need help from above to guide me the rest of the way. i understand that everything that i still dont know is for the reason of learning for source, for source is me.
if anyone can relate to this then respond on facebook. i am always open to information, because all information is a form of a sign.
what i am really trying to say is that they keep telling me that the event, or the new golden age is right around the corner. that is fine, but i dont know how much longer the suffering has to continue. it seems like delay after delay. i often think that my doubts and worries ae part of this delay. i dont have anything that i need here anymore, and i can not just physically take this much longer, it would be impossible for me to go back into the system and live out a decent life, at all. i might as well be in an old age home and be catered to. i dont want that at all either. i keep seeing everywhere, dont give up.
i believe this is how i live through the 3rd dimensional death. resurrection without dying. and i do it all for you.
make my doubt and worries go away.
~ THE BROTHERHOOD OF THE STAR
~Gary
ascension symtoms
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